Rose's Admires
by MangoTango450
Summary: VA crack fic: For some reason all the guys are on Rose's tail today and Rose is having a mental breakdown due to that fact, how will Rose deal with all of these hormone driven boys? M: Sexual refrences and Mature language. AU.


**Well you all voted and you got it, a Vampire Academy Crack fic! This doesn't have a place in the books so its kinda a Alternative Universe, Enjoy!**

**Warning: This Fic Contains Sexual references and Mature Language, perhaps even Crude Humor...Okay it is Crude Humor.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything Vampire Academy series related.**

**Rose's Admires one-shot.**

Rose was walking down the side walk when suddenly Adrian stepped in her way "Mother fucker where did you come from?!" Rose exclaimed. Adrian smiled and replied "Oh I hid behind that bush over there, I knew you would try to run, so I thought I'd ambush you!" Adrian looked proud.

"So why are you acting more perverted than usual?" Rose asked looking for escape routs.

Adrian got on one knee and pulled out a little velvet box "Rosemary Hathaway, I've loved you since the day I saw you and will always love you, will you marry me?" He asked.

Rose was dumbstruck "Wait, you love me?" She asked completely surprised.

Adrian looked at her disbelievingly " What the fuck, Yes I love you! Why the fuck else would I do all this stuff for you?-Rose Slowly backed away- I mean seriously,-Rose was gone at this point- I don't give random girls thousands of dollars!" He ranted on.

Adrian realized that Rose was gone "Damn she's fast..." He said.

-

"Yeah he totally freaked me out" Rose finished telling Lissa about Adrian.

"Rose can't you see he loves you!" Lissa exclaimed so loudly that people looked toward us.

"Yeah and so does Dimitri, Mason, Ralph, Jesse and Christi-" Rose slipped up.

"What?! Rose were you about to say Christian?!" Lissa screamed.

"Uhh...No?" Rose said.

"Oh Okay!" Lissa smiled and skipped off, but tripped..."FUZZY JELLY BEANS!!!" Lissa yelled.

Rose started walking to her other class but felt like she was being watched... She kept walking, but a voice suddenly spoke...

"Rose, lets go to candy mountain Rose!" another voice piped up "Yeah Rose candy mountain!" _Speak of the Devil and he shall appear..._

"What do you fucktards want?!" Rose growled at Jesse and Ralph.

"To fuck yo- OMG IS THAT A BUTTERFLY?!" Ralph asked pointing outside. Jesse frowned and shook his head then looked at Rose "Ignore him...But yeah how about you and me go to a closet and -OMG THAT IS A BUTTERFLY!!" Jesse screamed. Rose made a run for it, but got tackled in the hallway...

"WHY!!!" Rose screamed at the ceiling. She turned her head and saw it was Adrian "Rose please just come with me to bed and I'm sure you'll change your mind!" He yelled. Rose screamed and whacked him with her back pack "FUCK OFF!!!" She wiggled free and ran to the gym.

-

She closed and locked the door behind her and leaned against it, breathing out a sigh of relief she looked up to see she had interrupted a class.

"Miss Hathaway, thank you for gracing us with your presence, now GET IN LINE!"Stan yelled. In truth Stan has a little crush on Rose, he just doesn't know how to share his feeling in any other way than teasing and being mean.

"Hi Rose!" Mason greeted. Another guy was about to say hi but Mason punched him.

"Hi Mase, what up" Rose asked, still a little flustered.

"Oh nothing" He smiled, his eyes wondered over her body.

Rose snapped her fingers and glared at Mason-Who just smiled at her-.

"OMIGOD WHY ARE ALL THESE BOYS ON A HORMONAL RAGE?!"Rose accidentally screamed out loud. Everybody in the room turned to look, Rose smiled and everybody scooted away from her.

"KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK ITS RALPH LET ME IN!" Ralph yelled through the gym door.

Rose screamed and jumped out the window.

-

Rose ran down the hall way and saw Adrian sneaking around the hall, she stopped and ran into the first door she saw, which happened to be a closet. Breathing out a sigh in relief, Rose relaxed a little.

"Hey sexy, what are you doing in here?" A voice whispered huskily in her ear.

Rose choked "SON OF AH BITCH!" She tried to scream, but a hand covered her mouth.

"Rose its me Christian" Christian whispered.

"What the hell are you doing in a closet?!"Rose whisper screamed at him.

"What do you mean?" Christian asked looking confused.

Rose didn't even start on how normal people don't hang out in closets on a daily bases, she just went quite.

"Well as long as we're both in here" Christian whispered, before Rose felt a hand snake its way on her hip.

Rose elbowed the freak in the ribs before stomping out of the closet, Christian hissed when the light hit him on her way out.

"Strigoi wannabe freak" Rose grumbled on her way out.

-

Rose snuck around the school grounds, she was rolling from bush to bush and humming spy music when a voice asked what the hell she was doing, Rose looked up to see who it was "Dimitri! Oh uh nothing!" Rose exclaimed standing up quickly and brushing herself off.

"Roza I have something to tell you" Dimitri said seriously and started to walk off.

"Okay, what the fuck" Rose shrugged and followed him. Dimitri led Rose to a public park a few miles from the Academy, he sat on a bench and patted beside him, getting Rose to sit next to him.

Once was was comfortable Dimitri started "Rose we've been together a long time now-" Dimitri was interrupted by Rose "You mean a couple of months?" She asked.

"Yes Roza, you see I think your the most b-" Dimitri stopped and stared at a hott chick playing with her dog. Rose frowned and went and scared the girl off then sat back with Dimitri "As you were saying" Rose encouraged him to continue.

"As I was saying, I love you Roza...Will you be my girlfriend?" Dimitri asked giving Rose puppy dog eyes.

"Huh, I don't know, I mean, we don't have anything in common, besides that we both like kicking ass and we're both hott" Rose thought aloud.

"Oh...So do you just want to get laid then?" Dimitri asked.

Rose Punched him in the stomach and walked away back to the academy.

-

Rose was climbing up the school wall, Trying to get to Lissa's room without attracting any guys, but she missed her footing and fell to the ground. Groaning Rose sat up rubbing her back "Damn it..." Rose groaned.

"Rose are you okay?!" Adrian asked running over to Rose.

Rose screamed and started to limp away, but he had the advantage of having a working body "Nooooooo!" Rose yelled.

Adrian had Rose sit down and was looking over her body _Fucking pervert _Rose was thinking the entire time, but she was saved when she saw Eddie walking by, Rose quickly made a bunny ear hand signal to him, Eddie looked confused.

"Damn I forgot to make it look like the bunny was hopping" Rose thought. She redid the Signal and Eddie finally got it, He walked up behind Adrian and did that awesome Ninja thing were you pinch a shoulder and the person crumples to the ground.

Rose threw herself at Eddie "Oh My God, Thank you Eddie!" She screamed. Eddie shrugged and helped Rose make it to Lissa's room.

-

Eddie had left and Lissa fixed Rose up "My god Liss, I'm freaking out, All these guys are attacking me" Rose mumbled through her fatal position. She heard feet going by the door and started to spaz out, Rose ran to the closet and buried herself in all of Lissa's clothes. Lissa was looking at Rose like she was crazy.

Hahaha nobody will find me in hear, Rose lifted her head a little and peeked out of the clothes, Seeing nothing wrong Rose buried herself deeper, only to touch some thing hard and cold. Rose froze, slowly she moved her hand under the clothing and touched the cold hard thing, she pulled it up only to see that it was a human bone.

"OMIGAWD LISS HAS SKELETONS IN HER CLOSET!!!" Rose screamed before running out and jumping through the window.

-

"Okay jumping out of the window was a terrible idea..."Rose groaned, she was laying on a bush that had help break her fall. Grumbling she sat up, but she remembered that she and Eddie had hid Adrian's body in this bush.

She looked down to see Adrian underneath her grinning "Wow my wish came true" He smirked. Rose Screamed and limped away, before Adrian could get up.

Panting she hid in a alleyway, she saw Adrian coming so she went deeper in, but stopped when she saw a creepy looking door panted black "Hmm...Adrian or Scary door, Adrian or Scary door, Adrian is more scary than this door so it must mean its safe to go in!" Rose decided without hesitation. Ignoring the "Death beyond this point" sign, Rose walked in.

"Wow it sure is dark in here" Rose said with irritation, she couldn't see anything. Suddenly the torches on the hallway walls lit up, Rose blinked and kept walking down the hallway, music slowly drifted to her.

_"I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world"_The words drifted around Rose, realization finally struck her, this was the Barbie club... Rose looked horrified, but kept walking to the end of the hall, where a room was completely decked out in a Barbie theme.

Rose watched in horror as what seems as the leader stepped on stage-She wore a cloak- and pulled out a doll and started brushing its hair, the members broke out in applause, while Rose was thinking 'What...The...Hell...'.

The leader stepped of stage and took off her hood, it was...

**TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO FIND OUT WHO THE HELL WAS IN THAT GAY(No offence) CLOAK!!!**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**-**

**JUST KIDDING! **

Christian!!! Rose Blanched, but wasn't that surprised, she had gone through his closet one day when she was bored. Slowly she backed away from the terrible images before her and walked back to her dorm.

The day was finally over, Rose got in her PJ's and lied in her bed, today was the worse day of her life and she was hoping she could forget it ever happened, tucking herself in, she reached over and turned off the lights...

"Good night Rose...".

**-**

Screams echoed throughout the campus.

**END!**

**_**

**THERE!!! WHOOO!! YAY!! I GOT SIX! I GOT SIX! I GOT SIX AT THE SUN STARE! YEAH...**

**Review and tell me what you all thought ;-D**

**-MT**


End file.
